Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Enter the cloud

“The LORD said He would dwell in the dark cloud."
I Kings 8:12

A few months ago I was reading The Beginner's Bible to my daughter. We came to Exodus when God gave Moses the 10 Commandments on Mt. Sinai.

God called Moses up to the mountain.
He wanted to talk to Moses.
The mountain shook.
A thick cloud covered it.
There was thunder and lightning.
God had come to the mountain in the cloud.

As I read that I sat there stunned. I couldn't keep reading to my daughter. I just froze as that last sentence boomed inside of my head. GOD HAD COME TO THE MOUNTAIN IN THE CLOUD.

As I sat there frozen, this idea swirled around inside of my brain a few times and hit me smack in the face. The idea that God is in the thunder and lightning. It's exactly opposite of what I had always thought. When God comes down and is near, it can be a very scary and chaotic time.

It's stormy.

It's not always a cloudless blue sky, it can be crazy.

It's scary.

It's not what you think it will be.

I sat there and stared at that picture of the black mountain and the grey clouds and the lightning...I froze, taking it in. I realized that was us.

We were in the cloud.

 A few days later I stumbled across this picture in one of our coloring books.

Again, this image of the swirling storm, the's a frightening image. I ripped it out and put it on my dresser. I just felt I needed to save it.

Yesterday, I stumbled upon that coloring page while I was trying to clear off the piles on my dresser. As soon as I saw it I stopped. I strained my brain because it was all coming back to me and at the same time I was putting it together with yesterday's Streams in the Desert reading.

"Moses drew near unto the thick darkness where God was."   Exodus 20:21

God has still His hidden secrets, hidden from the wise and prudent. Do not fear them; be content to accept things that you cannot understand; wait patiently. Presently He will reveal to you the treasures of darkness, the riches of the glory of the mystery. Mystery is only the veil of God's face.

Do not be afraid to enter the cloud that is settling down on your life. God is in it. The other side is radiant with His glory. "Think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing has happened unto you; but rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings." When you seem loneliest and most forsaken, God is nigh. He is in the dark cloud. Plunge into the blackness of it's darkness without flinching; under the shrouding curtain of His pavilion you will find God awaiting you.

Again, He is telling me to "wait patiently".

"He will reveal to you the treasures of darkness."

That struck me. We have always referred to our children as our Treasures, we call them T1, T2, T3, T4 and T5. Isabel and Samuel are our treasures of darkness.

"When you seem loneliest and most forsaken, God is nigh. He is in the dark cloud."

Oh, how forsaken we have felt these last many months, and how far God has seemed from us. Although I don't feel his smile upon us, I do take comfort in this. I know He is reaching out to comfort me and reassure me that although we are in the cloud, He is there with us.


Jesse said...

Just wanted to let you know that the last few posts on your blog (this one included) have really helped and encouraged me spiritually. Thank you for sharing your insights with us. Praying for you and your family.

Debra said...

I'm so glad Jesse. It's the Lord, speaking to me, to us.

Hannah said...

This is amazingly true. I loved the part that said...Do not be afraid to enter the cloud that is settling down on your life. God is in it. The other side is radiant with His glory.

I'm so afraid at times to enter the cloud. I needed to hear the reminder that the other side is radiant. I realize this does not mean I will get what I want, but that He is there to walk me through the good and the bad!

Jesse and I found out yesterday that we are expecting again. I'm a nervous wreck, but I am also fully aware that God is in the center of this cloud ready to lead me through to the other side.

Debra said...

Congratulations Hannah! That is so exciting. Hold onto the Lord's peace, rest knowing you are not in control, He is.

The Tellinghuisen Family said...

You did it again! Made me cry! I SO needed this blog...NEEDED THIS! I Love your blogs...they bring me strength.