If I could go back
Back to before the hopes and dreams
Before the heartache and sorrow
Before all the tears
I wouldn't Samuel.
Because now I know you.
I know your face.
You are one of us now.
You belong to us
And I would never want to undo that.
I wish I could have seen your little face
break out into smile.
To hear you laugh that baby laugh
Watch you nurse
Play peek-a-boo with your brothers and sister
Watch you sleep on Papa's chest
in the dim light of the lava lamp
But we will have to wait for all those things.
We will spend our lives dreaming of you
And the days ahead when we will get to know you
As you truly are.
Not just an adorable little face
But you as God created you.
Until then, grab your sister's hand.
When you see that one of us is coming
Wait for us at the gate.