Tuesday, February 26, 2008

A hat for Natalie

Here is a tiny hat I made for a friend of mine. I made it for her daughter, Natalie. Natalie passed away almost 8 years ago. She weighed somewhere in the 1 pound range. She was only 24 weeks and she was a twin. Her sister lived, and is now almost 8 years old.

It may seem strange to many...why knit a hat for a baby who has been dead almost a decade?

Well, because at the time that my friend had her baby girls, and lost one of them, I didn't know how to knit. And I didn't understand her pain. But since losing Isabel, I regret that I didn't do more to acknowledge Natalie's life and her mother's pain.

The other weekend, I knew I would see Natalie's mother and something hit me. The idea that I wanted to knit a hat for Natalie. Mostly, for her mother. So she would have something tangible to touch and hold when she takes down the inevitable box of keepsakes.

And plus, every baby deserves to have at least one item made just for them.

I used some very soft yarn from a recycled sweater, it was 55% silk, 30% angora and 15% nylon. It had a nice halo. I used some pink baby alpaca leftover from Isabel's blanket as the brim. I made it very small. I wanted it to be the right size for her, had she lived. It turned out so sweet.

I felt a little strange giving it to her mom, but I explained and I think she understood. In fact, I'm sure she did.

5 comments:

The Flick Family said...

I found your blog from "Happy to be called Mommy." I have found great comfort and strength from you. I found out that we had a miscarriage on Jan. 17, 2008. I was 17 weeks and 2 days along. This has been the hardest thing to go through. Just yesterday I stood in Walmart and wept in the paper products aisle as I heard a newborn crying in the aisle over. Thank you for your blog. I hope it is ok that I have linked you on our family's blog. If not please let me know!
-Mindy

Debra said...

Mindy,

Thank you for your comment. I am sorry to hear of your loss. All of those dreams we have of what life will be like 6 months from now, or 'next Christmas' are hard to reconcile with the new reality we find ourselves in.

I still have a hard time around babies as well.

I'm so glad you have found this blog helpful in some way. I have had my doubts about keeping it going. It seems so depressing. But I do like to have all of my thoughts in one place. Feel free to link to this blog.

17 weeks. You were well into the 'safe' zone at that point. It must have been a shock. I'm sorry.

Bethany said...

Mindy, I am so very sorry for your loss! I pray that you will find comfort and peace in time to come.

Debra,
What a kind and thoughtful gift that was for you to knit that baby hat for your friend.
I know that will be one of her most cherished keepsakes. The fact that it's been so long only makes your gift MORE special to her, because she knows that you remembered her baby after that much time. God is working through you every day to help and lift up women who are going through heartache. I hope that you will continue to inspire others to do the same.

Jessica said...

That was an amazing thing that you did for your friend. As a mom who lost her first child almost eight years ago as well, I am certain that your gift meant a lot to her. As time passes, anything that shows your baby is still real to other people is a huge blessing. I am so sorry for your loss.

Sarah said...

Oh, the hat was just perfect, so right. It seems even more sentimental that you included some of the alpaca from Isabel's blanket as part of the hat.